The Weirdest Mobile Gaming Merchandise Ever

As any developer will tell you, making money from games on the App Store and Google Play can be a tricky and imprecise science. And so, when a dev or studio does manage to score a sizable hit with one of their titles, they’ll often attempt to leverage that success and spin it off into a line of merchandise. You know, stuff like t-shirts, toys and phone cases emblazoned with the game’s brand and characters. Then, of course, there’s also the entire cottage industry of fan-produced merchandise that invariably springs up around particularly popular mobile games. The rule of thumb here seems to be: the bigger the game is, the more bizarre the merch gets.

Below, I’ve rounded up some examples of wonderfully weird products inspired by well-known mobile titles like Flappy Bird, Monument Valley and Clash of Clans. But first, a word of warning: while a lot of the items on this list are laughably dumb, some of them are actually quite cool — so don’t blame me if you end up with a hole in your wallet after reading this article!


The Angry B**bs Bra

When Angry Birds was at the height of its popularity, the game’s characters were plastered all over a wide variety of products, ranging from lunch boxes to bed spreads. So, hey, why not stick ’em on a bra too? That seems to have been the thinking of SceeneShoes, the Etsy user behind Angry B**bs. This brilliantly named bra — which is sadly no longer available for purchase — featured a hand-painted Angry Bird on one cup and a Bad Piggy on the other.

The Angry B**bs bra may have been an unofficial, fan-made item of merchandise, but it’s really no more unusual than some of the stuff the folks at Rovio signed off on over the years, such as an Angry Birds credit card or these utterly cringe-worthy Halloween costumes.


Your Very Own Monument Valley Totem

Are you a mega fan of Ustwo’s artsy adventure puzzler Monument Valley? Do you happen to have a couple of hundred dollars just laying around burning a hole in your pocket? If you answered “yes” to these questions, let me point you towards Etsy, where for $175.00 (plus shipping costs) you can purchase a ginormous, hand-carved effigy of everybody’s favorite Monument Valley character, the Totem.

Once you’re the proud owner of this charismatic hunk of wood, I’m not exactly sure what you’re meant to do with it. But the images on the Etsy product page seem to suggest you wander around cradling it like a baby, because that’s not weird or anything.


A $10,000 Flappy Bird T-Shirt

At first glance this piece of Flappy Bird merch might not look like anything special. It’s just another t-shirt commemorating Dong Nguyen’s short-lived mobile gaming sensation, right? Well, yeah. But get this! It costs a whopping $9,999.99 to buy. Wow, just shy of ten grand. For a t-shirt?!

If that price seems like a joke, that’s because it sort of is. released this eye-wateringly expensive item of clothing as a tongue-in-cheek reaction to those Flappy Bird loaded iPhones that were being sold for crazy prices on eBay shortly after the game’s demise. You can read more about that here.


Clash of Clans Shot Glasses

Is there a big spillover between fans of Clash of Clans and people who enjoy a tipple? It would seem so, because Etsy user KnLlaser‘s line of Clash of Clans branded shot glasses are selling like hotcakes. The glasses, which are laser engraved with cheeky Clash of Clans related phrases, have already racked up dozens upon dozens of reviews from happy customers.

Fair warning before you click over to Etsy for a look-see: some of the etchings are fairly rude and raunchy (hence why I haven’t included a picture here). But yeah, if you know someone who enjoys Clash of Clans, hard liquor and ribald humor, you now know what you’re getting them for Christmas.

Have you spotted any more weird and crazy mobile gaming merchandise in the wild? If so, we’d love to hear from you in the comments section below.